I experienced my first personal tragedy at the age of 15. I remember it like it was yesterday.
I’m writing this entry in a coffee shop, an hour away from when I’m supposed to perform as a Spoken Word poet. I’m frazzled, caffeinated and very nervous.
I have a friend who would want to do anything else in the universe than go home to her mom’s. In broad strokes, it has gotten to the point that she wishes that she wasn’t born as her mother’s daughter. She tells me (and a couple others – we have a group chat) countless stories of what her mom does that makes her feel like a failure, like she’s trapped in a corner.
As her friend, that breaks my heart. As someone who has seen her grow into a brilliant young woman despite all odds, to see her go through this makes me angry in a way that I don’t entirely know how to express.
Hello again, you wonderful weirdos. You didn’t think I’d be back? Well, to be fair, neither did I. I’ve been gone for a while and by now, I assume that you know that I’m no good at keeping a consistent posting schedule.
So, in true Eri fashion, I’m here to give you a life update. It’s been quite the break and I’ve got some stories to tell.
The feelings come in like house guests, starting with shock.
Last night, I had a rough patch.
The gist of it was that I felt that no matter what I did or made, it will not matter because nobody knows I exist. I didn’t blip on anyone’s radar. I’m invisible and will never be recognized for anything.
Money: whether or not we think it’s relevant, in a
Capitalist modern society, money is important. It’s what (currently) makes the world go round and what we use to accomplish many a task.
Being a fangirl of many things, along with spending a whole day on YouTube and some moments of reflection, I decided to make a vlog about the relationship between supporting your faves and being financially stable.