The feelings come in like house guests, starting with shock.
“Uhh, what’s with the title? What’s “The Secret Life of Ordinary Things”?”
So I don’t know if you know but in case you didn’t know, I’m trying to write a book. Currently, the working title is “The Secret Life of Ordinary Things”. It’s a compilation of my writings about my life: the mundane, everyday-ness of life from my somewhat introspective perspective.
Someone once asked me: “What advice would you give to your past self?”. What would I tell young me that would make their life easier? What would I remind myself in times of deep distress? When life gets hard, what words would I want to remember?
In response, I wrote fifteen simple words of wisdom, relative to me and my experience as a living human being. These are the things I tend to forget. Things I take for granted. Recurring mistakes, like the unread footnotes of my life. I wrote them down for me. I wrote them to remember. I wrote them to make them tangible.
I wrote them to share with you, in case you need some wisdom from a wondering, wandering twenty-four year old.
How are you? This must come as a surprise for you. Nobody asks you how you are anymore, right?
Yeah, I get that. Nobody asks me how I am either. They just go straight to the point. What they need. Who they’re looking for. Where to get this or that. I think people just open with a “how are you” to be polite. Nobody actually stays long enough to get the reply.
But I want to know. I’m here to listen. How are you?
How are things going for you? Are you well? Is everything alright?
Are you afraid to answer that it’s not?
That’s okay. I’m not alright either. I have a lot on my mind. A vast majority of it doesn’t make sense or have any significant relevance but hey, there they are anyway. And that’s okay. It’s okay to not be alright. We don’t owe the world to be consistently positive. Things happen and we need to remind ourselves that not everything is going to be a cheerful leap down the rainbow slide. And that it’s okay, normal even, to be unhappy sometimes.
Consider this your reminder, maybe.
So, yeah. How are you?
Do you have something you want to get off your chest? Something troubling you? Something you’d like to share?
I’m here. Let it out. I’m listening.
Some time ago, I was invited by my university org (DLSU Writers’ Guild) to do a talk on the topic of heartbreak. I don’t know why they chose me to do it. I’m not a professional writer. I don’t even write prose all that much, to be honest. Either way, it happened. I did the thing and I got a certificate. Whoop whoop!
As much as I try to live without regrets, sadly I do regret my approach to that particular talk. It wasn’t as informative as I wanted it to be. So as reparation, I decided to write this.
Disclaimer: Again, I’m not a professional writer. My technique comes from personal experience which involved a lot of trial and error. This is just a guide for you to use if you want to. Okay? Okay, cool. 😀
“I think I like you.”
“I like you, too.”
“No, I mean I think I’m falling for you.”
It took me a moment for your words to sink in. It felt like I was in a movie: right at the part where the music swells and the protagonist folds their hands together in thoughtful contemplation. How is this happening? How does something like this happen to someone like me? It didn’t feel real because things like this never happen to people like me.
What do I do now?
I’m writing this “letter” in an attempt to reconcile my feelings towards people who have hurt me. In hopes of gaining personal closure. I don’t expect these people I’m dedicating this letter to to acknowledge their mistakes or for us to be friends again. I just want to get this out for myself.
And maybe, to help you – in case you’re going through the same thing. Bullying is never okay. If you’re being bullied, I’m here for you.